Getting out of high school is like having a weight lifted off of me. All of a sudden I feel so lazy.

Now this would be okay if my parents were taking me on vacation like all my other friends' parents are but mine are not.

This would also be okay if I don't have a shopping list the size of my leg, but I do.

I need a job, guys.

I need a job.

It's impossible to post anything with depth or dazzle on the internet, when people might know who you are. I save my depth and dazzle for my anonymous moments.

Well okay, have a little: I see your ghost in living flesh, in features so familiar the unfamiliar expressions on them are a torment. I see you as you were, and not as you are, and all the little red flags should go up because of that one detail. I don't miss anyone, because I don't know anyone, really (who does?) but I do a very good job of pretending to miss someone who could have been you.

Emo little rant aside, college kid is born into the world! Global alcohol consumption increases by a fraction of a percent. Kids, leave your impact on the world. Kids, make a difference!